When in doubt.... Puke it OUT!

Arrrggggg.... Nausea all day is nothing to look forward to each morning I wake up. But I like to think that everyday that I "survive" that I'm one day closer to feeling better, does it really get better? Well When?!! I'll start counting down the days like now~ My body is going through some major changes mannn.. :o) My boobs hurt, my pants dont fit at all, I'm exhausted when I roll out of bed to stumble to the bathroom since my bladder is about to explode.... The daily cravings or dislikes are growing at a rapid rate! This baby don't like nothing I used to love to eat, not even my old time good buddy: Choco-latte~ Whats up with that? I don't know but I'm willing to try anything as long as I don't sick,heart burn or that strange taste in my mouth the rest of the day! And the SMELLS are driving me loco! I smell like some super human, why is that so the baby can get a whiff what "he's" getting ready to kick back up? lol, seriously once I smell it there goes the gag factor, a whole ball of fun or bundle of joy as they would say.Brushing teeth is a new found mission, hurry up get the tongue brushed and get out before I return all my food in this sink!  Man its rough out here in this prego game. I'm gonna have a nice long chit chat with miss eve when I get up to heaven....I was feeling so bad all day like what should I eat to take this feeling away? Just plain grossed out & not feeling like anything but a dark room & our bed... The smells in the kitchen as I was makin his dinner got me & I ran to the nearest shiny white pretty little abode, & proceeded  to drop & give em' all that I just had, theres no holding back when that smacks ya, its like a fire drill: Stop, Drop & let it Roll! lol! But after wards man such a relief, so I guess its not so bad to let the juices flow. ;o)  And I think of that 19 kids and counting lady, is she a woman who likes pain & agony? I'm having a hard time with the first one & she did this about 20 times more than me. The thought of it makes me uneasy...

Well I did want to write a good note.

Sometimes when I'm by myself and just thinkin & pondering about all the crazy things rolling through my mind, I get this urge of happiness & joy, and I'm in a positive mood, then it hits me like wait a min. why did I get happy all of a sudden? What occurred that brought this joy, I didn't do anything different. Then it comes into my mind... I have a new joy inside of me, I look down & remember I'm carrying not only the problems that come with pregnancies but the most important, the pleasure of having a little baby growing in my belly! I teared up thinking wow, God blessed me, Me! With the blessing of having a little one with the love of my life. I get to have the joy that I'm married to inside me, I get to carry this with me where ever I go, my joy of Lucson is with me, now not only in my heart but also in the form of a little him. Its amazing & breath taking that I have this... Its incredible that I have this new experience that one could never really fathom. So I will carry my bundle of joy & "his" little friends: nausea, wooziness, enhanced senses & even enlarged... umm.. you know what I mean, I'll just keep on growing up & learning new things everyday till the next time I get to see our baby on the black & white screen & hear their little heart beating like a good baby.

One of those Life Changin' Moments

Today is the first day in a couple weeks that I've felt "Up" to typing my entry about all the grand news! I needed to start this to keep track of the journey of our new baby coming. I'm so excited and before its the three of us I want to save my memories of just us two. In a few more months they're will never be us WE it will be Us 3, so I want to enjoy these precious moments, to really appreciate each other. Since its from Me and I'm the baby bearer ;o) I can mostly tell you my P.O.V.

Sleep is my new hobby, if I don't get ample time doing my hobby I become wicked! LOL! I feel bad for him sometimes cuz I will just snap or be pushy, this baby is makin me go through some serious changes: mental, physical, and emotional. The prolem is I already had issues with all of those aspects, now I get another large dose~! But I'm super excited, nervous, anxious, sleepy, & usually nauseous. But I want to start from the beginning and follow suit...

Once upon a time in a land far, far away... No just kiddin!

Over the last few weeks I've been going through it people, I mean: waiting, doctors, and lots of blood work, negative prego tests, low hcg levels, strange doctors, vag. ultrasounds, co-pays, time off work, waiting, rising hcg levels, dodging my co-worker's spies, finding ob.gyn.'s, waiting, a whole lot of Google searches: JUST A Whole Lotta Craziness~! I was so worried that there was something seriously wrong with me, something... Cuz it just couldn't Be Nothing.

I had to pray alot and ask for my elders of church to pray for me and that reassured me that God had my hand the whole way and he would take care of me no matter what occured. I had to seriously quit running in circles chasing my tail & give it all to God. Once I literally calmed down & took a breath & let go of the burdens of stress and pressure things began to look up. I could almost visually see little beams of light flow down from Heaven & clarify all my concerns. I didn't have to talk to a therapist, or a priest, or a non-believer, I just talked to the one who brought me through my whole life. He has never let me down & till the day I take my last breath he'll see me through.

So on 6/25/10 I finally got a glimpse of: what all the fuss was about. Our itty-bitty chocolate sprinkle sized baby! *With a flutter of a heart beat* I had to fight the tears that were ready to flow, my eyes just glistened... They approximated about 6 weeks along, so why I look like I gained about 10 pounds, don't ask! ;oP